Whenever ACS heard the word "dangle," what did she think of? Testes.

A molecular and cell biology major, ACS did not need her college education, to know that, when it's hot, a man's testes migrate or dangle, to get away from the main body's 98.6-degree heat. Since we played a lot of sports, ACS would ask, "Do your dangling balls get in the way, when you are trying to run? Don't they hurt, when they get jostled to and fro, between your legs?"

Fortunately, human testes do not weigh as much as a Pranawire Linebacker. Unfortunately, if you are using a Linebacker on any component which is not on or close to the floor, it (the Linebacker) will dangerously dangle. At the very least, the Linebacker will put strain on your component's IEC jack. If the Linebacker works its way loose, it may do a scary crash below.

Sigh, ACS quips, "If you don't have the balls to let it [the Linebacker] dangle, you need to prop it up."

Most people have an audio/video rack relatively close to the wall. ACS suggests using a small platform or even wall shelf behind your rack. But then, you'd have to pull said rack out and away from the wall. Do you have such space? ACS, a thong aficionado who likes going cuntmando even better, jokes that pulling the rack further away from the back wall is like a man going with loose boxers.

If you rest the Linebacker (which she likens to a dildo) against a wall, it might put small dents into that wall. Or, it might "make like a push-up bra," and shove the connected components to and fro.

I have tried the Linebacker with a wide variety of powercords. Perhaps because of the Linebacker's Furutech IEC jack and Oyaide F1 AC plug, this Linebacker just does not like the Acrolink CF plugs found on my Pranawire Satori and Cosmos powercords.

Perhaps it is due to the included Oyaide F1 AC plug, but this Linebacker is much happier with my Pranawire Maha Samadhi powercords, which are terminated with Oyaide M1/F1 plugs.

Then, the Linebacker can fulfill its duty as an inline AC filter. The cleaner AC then provides a more transparent view into the recorded soundscape. The images are better-scaled, with better separation. The music moves more freely, kind of like ACS' vision/analogy of a naked man's testes comfortably flapping in warm weather.

Removing the Linebacker shows its true value and influence. After I go back to the otherwise perfectly fine powercord(s), the affected component loses its soundstaging and focus. The images become dirtier, more jiggly (get your mind out of the gutter!). It's like the music developed a cold.

As of this writing, we still do not know how or why Pranawire came up with the non-Sanskrit name, "Linebacker," for their inline AC filter. Personally, I think they'd be better off, using sports nomenclature, for ALL of their products. Without being labeled "sellout," Pranawire using sports monikers would gain greater, deeper, and more emotional appeal. Nevertheless, I have three audiophile friends who, while not specifically liking any particular Sanskrit product name, strongly prefer that Pranawire remain consistent, and bestow a Sanskrit name to the Linebacker.

Even though Pranawire have their own audiodharma Cable Cooker, you do not know if your Linebacker has been given the full treatment. So do it yourself.

Note that, in order to complete the loop, you'll have to use a powercord in front of the Linebacker's IEC input. Oh well, that way you get to treat both the powercord and the Linebacker. I left this particular Linebacker on the Cooker for 3 straight days.

Men are always trying to extend the length of their penis. Once in a while, an audiophile will have or buy a cable which is too short. This usually happens, after the audiophile has moved the components around. Whatever, if your powercord is a bit too short, getting a Pranawire Linebacker can extend the reach, as well as perform its primary task, which is to filter noise.

ACS calls this the "dickhead end." The Linebacker comes stock with an Oyaide F1 plug, which attaches to the back of one of your components. I do not know how much Pranawire would charge for other AC plugs, such as the Acrolink CF.

ACS calls this the "scrotal area." The important thing is, the powercord portion is securely attached to the metal chassis.

A band around the base of the powercord lists the serial number, which, like some vacuum tubes, includes a date. Don't give ACS any ideas.

When I was in high school, the tubby ACS was one of the few girls, who would play football. That doesn't mean she was any good, but at least she enthusiastically participated, which was more than I could say about many of the guys.

Pranawire are known for applying Sanskrit names to some of their products. They have taken a lot of flak for using the name "Vajra" on a powercord. Perhaps stung by that criticism, they ditched the Sanskrit, and went with the sports name, "Linebacker," for their inline AC noise filter.

In the mid-90s, regular folk made the transition from mid-fi to high-end audio. Once these people bought the components, they spent money on tweaks. When ACS saw me and other audiophiles checking out inline filters, she remarked, "Inline filters? Sounds like condoms."

So when it comes to the Pranawire Linebacker, I think of ACS, who not coincidentally was shaped like a small football linebacker. When I reviewed the Vajra, I showed its inline Linebacker module. The Linebacker itself is available as a discrete product. The stock 15-amp version retails for $2,250. I believe that a version with a 20-amp inlet can be made for $2,500.

At the input end (sounds kinky, but isn't), the Linebacker sports a Furutech 15-amp IEC inlet.

ACS jokes that the Linebacker's metal chassis houses a dildo. More importantly, the module is heavy. This is similar to, for example, the metal boxes found on MIT's Oracle series products. You will have to find a way to accommodate and support the heavy Linebacker module.

At the output end, the Linebacker includes a length of Satori powercord. ACS says the tape measure above makes the whole thing seem phallic. Be that as it may, from tip-to-tip, the powercord portion is less than 14" long.

In July 1994, I bought a discrete bi-wire Kimber 8TC. That meant using two runs of speaker cable, tied together at the amp end. This fed my Signet SL-280 B/U, a bi-wireable speaker.

After many months of auditioning speakers, I caved in, and ordered the Thiel CS.5, which was a single-wire model. That meant my old bi-wire Kimber 8TC was no longer usable. So while waiting for the Thiel CS.5 to arrive, I had the bi-wire 8TC re-terminated. It then morphed into a "shotgun" configuration. That is, one run of cable was dedicated for the +, one run for the -. Because Kimber were so fast, the re-terminated 8TC arrived before the Thiel CS.5 did.

When the Thiel CS.5 (pictured above) arrived in November 1996, ACS helped me bring it home, unbox it, and set it up. Because we had the "shotgun" 8TC, that meant four separate runs of cable, going from amp (Classe' CA-100) to the two speakers. When ACS went behind the CS.5, and lifted the 8TC(s) off of the floor, I heard improved sound. So, we switched positions (please, no sex jokes). When I lowered the 8TC (speaker cable, not ecstasy) onto the floor, ACS heard the system sound worse: garbled, muffled, grainy, rolled-off up top.

ACS had the gift of gab, was always on the move. So it was very interesting, when she'd watch porn. She sat stoically and perfectly still, and would, on occasion, actually stop talking. That meant she was observing, taking it all in (sounds kinky, but isn't), mentally processing film/video.

If you have discrete bi-wire speaker cables, shotgun speaker cables, or just multiple cables, you can thread one through the Dedicated Audio Cable Tower's central hole, and rest the other on the top semi-circular cutout. Sigh, under the influence of porn, ACS calls this "double penetration."

The Cable Tower is about $20 each. They are small enough, and cheap enough, that perhaps you could, in ACS' words, "go for sloppy seconds," "get screwed twice," and buy twice as many. That way, you could place the Cable Towers side-by-side (or staggered, as in the photo above), to accommodate the multiple runs of cable. Geez, I remember the mid-90s, when audiophiles would talk about keeping cables parallel to each other. ACS would flash her ebullient smile, and joke, "Two lovers should lie parallel to each other." Audiophiles would also talk about making cables at righ angles to each other. To which ACS responded, "Two lovers perpendicular to each other would also work."

ACS was well-known for taking gratuitous snapshots of genitals and other body parts. Okay, so taking photos of audio products isn't as titillating as ACS' porno-inspired shots. But here above is a gratuitous close-up photo of the Cable Tower, if not in action, in use.

Perhaps because she worked at Victoria's Secret, ACS had a penchant for comparing the body types of her friends. And when it came to males, she liked to compare and contrast their penises. Sigh, okay, okay...you guys want me to compare the Dedicated Audio Cable Tower to other "dick lifts." I still have ceramic cable lifts. I do not have any of the foam-based cable lifts. But at any rate, all of my cable lifts pretty much sound the same. Every now and then, I suspect that the Cable Tower is infinitesimally less airy up top. But it's so fleeting as to be not worth our time and effort. The main thing is, the Cable Tower gets your cable(s) off the floor, and does not appear to introduce any negative effects.

ACS never really liked to shave her armpits. She would come back from East Asia, and tell me that girls over there tended not to shave. Even when ACS did shave, she had this persistent 5 o'clock shadow. And within a day, the prickly stubble would become a few millimeters long. Borrowing one of my favorite analogies, ACS said that shaving her armpits felt like a losing proposition, like "building a sand castle too close to the surf." When using deodorant, ACS did not like being in the stubble stage. You see, little balls of deodorant would bead up on the short hairs and ridges of skin. ACS would then go long stretches, without shaving. After a while, her armpit hair would be thicker, blacker, and more plentiful than mine.

ACS and her friends would travel to foreign countries. Upon returning to the U.S., ACS would remark that we Americans were the only ones with networks of phone and power lines strung across poles. Other countries ran their communications and power underground.

But when it comes to audio/video systems, no one wants to run cabling through a wall or floor. Ever since the mid-to-late 90s, I've been using ceramic-type cable lifts. ACS remarked that, if I didn't have the ceramic devices, I could have and should have built something fancy out of Legos. As expensive as Legos are, ACS posits, they are still cheaper than using sex toys to prop up audio cables.

Please set aside your jokes about close shaves. ACS quips, if you space the Cable Towers too far apart, even the stiffest dicks cables will sag to the ground. She laughs, "They're not well hung." She then pauses for a moment, and shrugs, "Since I never had big boobs, there's nothing to sag to the ground. One less thing to worry about." More so because she was into athletics, ACS liked to wear sports bras, or any other type without an underwire. Hahaha, I still remember the awkward time we and our friends were innocently playing basketball, when the flat-chested ACS tried to push her breasts together, then complained out loud, "Damn, no cleavage. I'm never gonna get titty fucked."

Okay, so it's not like the space between boobs, but Dedicated Audio recommend a spacing of 12"-18" between each Cable Tower. That, of course, depends on the cables. But do plan accordingly. Be sure to order enough Cable Towers, in order to prop up the cable's entire length.

One morning, before going out to play sports, ACS and I were in the shower. ACS shaved one armpit, but not the other. Then she shaved one leg, but not the other [no, she never, in all the years I've known her, shaved her pubes]. She then told me, "Let's see if anyone notices."

To which I responded, "Even if they notice, they may not feel comfortable in saying anything about it."

Nope, even if someone noticed ACS' mismatched shave job, no one said anything. After we got home and got into the shower, ACS shaved her other armpit and leg.

Yes, if you utilize Cable Towers to prop up one channel, but not the other, you can discern their effects.

Notice this. Due to their small size and low mass, the Cable Towers are perhaps not the best for propping up heavy, large, and/or bulky items, such as powerline conditioners, or the boxes found on MIT Oracle cables and the Pranawire Linebacker. I do not recommend shaving off any of the Cable Tower's top semi-circular cutout, to accommodate fatter cables and boxes. For bulky items, I prefer to use the wider-girth (get your mind out of the gutter!) Rightway Audio Suspender. Since Rightway Audio appear to have gone out of business, the next best thing would be the Cable Elevator.

Dedicated Audio do make the Cable Tower V2 in black, but why?

Though well-finished, the black is ugly. But at least the surfaces are shiny, not matte.

In all my years as an audiophile, I can't recall a system, whose looks would be improved with black-colored thingies littered on the floor. ACS called them "urchins." She would then look at and point at my black-colored tuner, DAC, VCR, TV, Sega Genesis, rack poles, and speaker grilles. Then ACS needled me, "Black looks good for lingerie, but not for stereos."

This reminds me of the signs put up at construction sites. ACS says it looks like "Batman got his wings clipped."

In the early-to-mid 90s, ACS worked part-time at various Victoria's Secret stores. In these pages, you have seen some of her wares. With or without lingerie, ACS loved snapping risque photos. Since those shots were taken in dark or low-light rooms, taking good and clear photos was difficult. If the flash was not used or did not go off, you just got inky darkness. If the flash did go off, it often created over-exposed shots. Remember, those were the days of 35mm cameras. You had to use up a roll of film. Then you had to take that film, and get it developed.

Wow, even with today's digital photography, taking pictures of Dedicated Audio's clear acrylic Cable Tower is tricky. This looks ghostly, or at least like a translucent jellyfish. Even though the Cable Tower looks hinged, it is not. The legs open at a fixed angle (sounds kinky, but isn't). Vertically, the Cable Tower is 4.5" tall.

When working at Victoria's Secret, ACS wasn't one of those fixated on measurements. She placed a greater priority on fit, rather than raw measurements. When it came to bras, ACS would first discern what type of breast the customer had. Then ACS would suggest certain styles which would be appropriate for the customer's breast type. And then, ACS would go to the measurements. That said, the Cable Tower is 3.125" deep.

Unlike many of our friends, ACS happily and comfortably frequented "adult entertainment" stores. Uh oh, ACS has made crude jokes about the Cable Tower's circular cutout. If you are using multiple runs of cable, you are supposed to thread one through the cutout, which measures 1.375" in diameter. No, don't go there. But do be aware that many fat-barrel IEC plugs will not fit through the Cable Tower's center hole. Taking a wider view, you should note that the Cable Tower measures 3.5" wide. You will also just have to experiment for yourself, if the Cable Tower's four pointed "feet" will work on your type of flooring. Some of you have hardwood floors. Some of you have laminate floors. Some of you have loop pile carpet. Some of you have plush carpet with cut pile. Some of you have concrete flooring.

In the mid-00s, the original Cable Tower had an O-ring, which could be stretched over the top semi-circular cutout. Yep, ACS made jokes, comparing that O-ring to birth control devices and sex toys. The current-production "V2" lacks the O-ring. You simply rest your cable into the semi-circular cradle or cutout. Sigh, ignore ACS' gratuitous comments about "dick lifts."

The first time I actually saw anyone suspend audio cables was at the March 1993 Stereophile show in San Francisco. At least two rooms taped, hung, or otherwise stuck cables onto the hotel room walls. One attendee asked that, since "we are in earthquake country, don't the walls shake? Isn't that a bad thing?"

To which the host remarked that the floors were shakier than they seem. But more importantly, he posited, floors represented a "bad environment" for cables.

Perhaps it was the room with various Shun Mook effluvia, which said that the floor is an electrostatic field, which disrupts cables' signal flow.

I was too lazy to try sticking cables to walls. Besides, I generally couldn't afford expensive audiophile cables in longer lengths. And when I did have excess cable (my original Monster Cable came in pre-cut factory-terminated 10-foot pairs; 8-feet would have been too long), it was too heavy to put up on a wall.

In November 1996, I bought the Thiel CS.5, whose spade-only binding posts were inconveniently located at the bottom of the rear. ACS helped me attach the Kimber 8TC. We were listening to David Benoit's Shaken Not Stirred. Cables should be neither shaken nor stirred! But while I was sitting on the couch, ACS went behind the speakers, and lifted the 8TC off the floor. Lo and behold, the sound became less dull and closed-in. WTF?! ACS and I switched spots. She, too, heard the sound get worse, when I dropped the 8TC onto the floor. And that was the first time we heard the benefits of getting the speaker cable off of the floor.

Since then, I have tried various devices to get cables off of the floor. ACS referred to them as "dick lifts." She would joke, "Do you need a hand? Do you want me to pull it? I have many other ways to make it rise."

Established in 2000, Dedicated Audio of Scottsdale, AZ weren't around in the mid-90s. But they do make their own cable lift, aptly named, "Cable Tower."

Technically, their current-production model is dubbed "Cable Tower V2." The original used to have an O-ring strung across the top gap/cut-out/cradle.

Wow, taking pictures of clear acrylic is tricky. More to come (sounds kinky, but isn't).

When I attended UC Santa Cruz, it was subdivided into eight residential colleges. Mine was the northern-most, Crown. My first two years were spent in Crown's dorms. My last two years were spent in the Crown-Merrill apartments, which were much more spacious than the cramped dorms. Furthermore, I had top-floor apartment units, which had a high ceiling above the kitchen, dining area, and living room.

Sigh, so many fond and cherished memories stem and linger from my senior year. I'll never forget the grayish loop pile carpet. I'll never forget the company, visitors, and even neighbors. I'll never forget the rains (many of which were heavy), which finally brought an end to a terrible 7-year drought. But it's the music, which set my senior year apart. When I hear music from that magical 92-93 school year, my memories are enhanced. They become sharper, more vivid. In some aspects, that senior year of college seems like eons ago. But in other ways, it seems like it never left, like it's still with me. It's as though I am still 20 years old.

Once again, the music was fortified, because we (my housemates and I) had some high-end audio (not mid-fi) products. Our stereo system comprised the Sony CDP-520ES II; Adcom GTP-400 and GFA-535; Pinnacle PN-5+; AQ Topaz, Lapis, and F-14. We would later add a Roomtune JustaRack 24 and a 2-outlet on-the-wall powerline conditioner.

I really had the best of both worlds. The Crown-Merrill apartments were peaceful, spacious, and clean. They allowed us to enjoy the isolation and sylvan environment of Santa Cruz, but without being in the backwater, overcrowded, filthy, claustrophobic, noisy log cabin dorms. The aforementioned stereo allowed us, via music, to stay connected with our homes in the urban Bay Area. My roommate Will would occasionally go home, and bring back food. I would occasionally go home to S.F., revel in shopping for high-end audio products, and fetch the new issues of Stereophile and TAS. When returning to Santa Cruz, I'd bring a few CDs with me. Yes, I would turn on the stereo, neglect my homework, eat too much junk food, read audio magazines and literature, and get lost in the music. Through all that, I really, Really, REALLY wished I had a PAC IDOS. I would stare at the stereo, and try to imagine how much better it would perform, if we had had an IDOS.

Now that I have an IDOS and IDOS 2, I have a better idea of what these units could do for an entry-level high-end system. The IDOS 2 is not current-limiting. Therefore, you can plug power amplifiers into it. To the far left is a Pranawire Satori, which leads to a supremely neutral Simaudio 600i. Versus the standard-setting Power Wing, the IDOS 2 displays losses in grip, punch, drive, power, focus, cleanliness, and definition. However, versus plugging an amp directly into a wall outlet (or any number of inferior PLCs), the IDOS 2 does not strangle or harden the sound as much. So if we still had the small, grainy, hard-sounding Adcom GFA-535, the IDOS 2 would bring about a more easy-to-tolerate perspective. At low volume levels, we wouldn't have to strain as hard, to make out musical details in the electronic noise field or the room's ambient background noise level. At louder levels, the upper midrange would not be as tense, hard, irascible, uptight, clumsy, and ear-piercingly strained.

But where the IDOS 2 is most effective is on source components. Pictured above, we have two Pranawire Maha Samadhis (at $5,000 each!) feeding a CD transport and DAC. Yep, even with this exalted calibre of front end, the IDOS 2 effects improvements. By removing RFI, the IDOS 2 allows you to "see" into the recorded soundscapes. The images are fuller, and more spread out. The notes have less interfering with their movement, flow, and decay. With less noise infecting the music, you can hear more of the instruments' textures.

As you may have surmised, the IDOS 2's errors are subtractive, not additive. As a passive device, it does not make any noise. Furthermore, the IDOS 2 is cold to the touch; i.e., it generates NO heat. The IDOS 2 would have been perfect for my college stereo system. With enough outlets, the IDOS 2 would have accommodated not just the Sony CD player and Adcom duo, but our TV, VCR, video game console, powered FM antenna, and lamps.

During the Fall '92 quarter, here are some of the songs (from that time) which froze/enraptured me, my friends, and housemates:

Patty Smyth, "Sometimes Love Just Ain't Enough"
Bobby Brown, "Humpin' Around"
Wreckx-n-Effect, "Rump Shaker"
Annie Lennox, "Walking On Broken Glass"
Jackyl, "Down On Me"
Swing Out Sister, "Am I The Same Girl"
Roy Orbison, "I Drove All Night"
10,000 Maniacs, "These Are The Days"
Peter Gabriel, "Steam"
k.d. lang, "Constant Craving"
Asia, "Who Will Stop The Rain"
Sade, "No Ordinary Love"

On account of that Sony/Adcom/Pinnacle/AQ system, we thoroughly dug the music. All these years, I regretted not getting a PAC IDOS (or IDOS 2) for that system. That was the one worthwhile upgrade which was within reach. I have used the IDOS 2 with "affordable" electronics from Adcom, California Audio Labs, Cambridge Audio, Creek, Denon, HeadAmp, JVC, Nintendo, Oppo, Rotel, Simaudio, Sony, and Toshiba. Because of this experience, I now know what the IDOS could have and would have done for that 92-93 college stereo. Overall, the music would have been less garbled. The images would have been less 2-dimensional. Said images would have spread out, in a larger soundstage, through which we could "see" more clearly. Transients would have been smoother. Textures would have been less hashy, easier to make out. Basslines and kick drum would have firmed up. So not only would we have had the thrill of musical discovery, we would have been even more emotionally involved in the music.

Now that the audiodharma Cable Cooker has allowed the IDOS 2 to provide cleaner, more spacious sound, I now know what I should have done instead, regarding that college stereo. Instead of the Adcom GTP-400, I should have paid $100 more, and gotten the remote-controlled GTP-450 in white. Instead of the AudioQuest interconnects, I should have gotten the original XLO Reference Type 1. In addition, I should have gone to Ultimate Sound, and had them cut some green-and-black XLO Pro speaker cable from the spool. And if there had been any funds for speakers, I should have gotten the NHT Model 1.3.

When talking about hi-fi, ACS recently conjectured that, if I had had an IDOS 2 in 92-93, "I don't know about your housemates, but you and Will probably would have had more sex, and even better sex." She paused for effect, then laughed, "No, not with each other! You guys would have had more sex with your girlfriends."